As moments go by I find myself longing. Longing to be able to rest my soul in Your presence. Longing to be able to let go. Longing to be able to just be.
Why is it such a challenge to discipline myself to merely sit in Your presence? Why is it a challenge to put aside distractions when I do?
The tears want to fall. I long for You. And when I feel like I don’t, I want to long for You–and this is obvious by the shear fact that I am thinking about it. But then why is sitting in Your presence at times such a challenge?
Sometimes I think the answer is the need for rest. If I am more rested, I think I will be able to focus more, and not grow sleepy in those times. But then I think the key to being more rested is simply changing the way I live and move and breathe in this life.
I must do it in You, for in You I live and move and breathe.
My soul I must learn to quiet and subject to discipline. My thoughts I must learn to still and take captive. My mouth I must learn to guard and realize just how much I say that doesn’t even need to be spoken. My attitude that sometimes hinders moments in Your presence must change somehow.
I want to be one of a gentle, quiet and beautiful spirit.
And I will be and I am. I know it is there because You are in me, Your Spirit is in me and Your Spirit is beautiful, gentle and so lovely. Beholding this, I can walk it out. So instead of focusing on all the do’s or don’t do’s, I want to focus on You. I want to behold You in all Your glory and beauty…
I want You to fill my mind and imagination with holy thoughts, holy word pictures, holy visions of Your beauty, gentleness and grace. Sanctify my imagination, my mind! Open the eyes of my understanding!
I want to sing of Your great goodness within and flowing out. As I write this, I am nearly singing it inside my soul. I want all the hindrances gone, Lord! I want to stop choosing to follow my flesh or emotions. I’m made to follow You! I want to behold You, I want to know You, and I want to be more like You in beauty with a gentle and quiet spirit full of gratitude and grace.
Open up my eyes. Open up my mind and my imagination. I want to see You. I want to behold You. I want to see Your beauty. Give me the enabling to do my part, for I know that You always do Yours.
“[For I always pray to] the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, that He may grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation [of insight into mysteries and secrets] in the [deep and intimate] knowledge of Him, By having the eyes of your heart flooded with light, so that you can know and understand the hope to which He has called you…”
(Ephesians 1:17-18 AMP)
This Scripture is such a friend to me right now. Your Word is such treasure.