Tag Archives: Testimonies

Disappointment to Fulfillment

I want to share something the Lord did today in an encounter I had with Him. I pray that this testimony will bless and inspire you to seek Him for any emotional healing you may have need of. He truly heals the brokenhearted.

This afternoon I spent some time with the Lord, asking Him to reveal things and bring some needed healing to my heart. Mainly I was fighting disappointment, something I have experienced many, many times from childhood until the present. The Lord had been bringing things to the surface for several weeks, pertaining to the friendship aspect of my relationship with Him (versus the Father aspect, etc.) I also had to spend some time forgiving those who had disappointed me, and repenting for my own sin in response that would happen at times.

I found that disappointment was one of two main factors affecting my view of the Lord and others in friendship. Because of many disappointments, I would rarely get my hopes up, because when I would, I’d often be let down again.

So for a few days I’d been riding a wave of disappointment that opened the door to all the thoughts of disappointments from the past. The Lord showed me that the opposite of disappointment is fulfillment. Oddly enough, as I surrendered my disappointment to Him, I was asking Him for an appointment with Him, specifically related to intimate friendship with Jesus.

He filled the broken places with His gold

After giving all my disappointments to the Lord and asking Him to remove every fragment of disappointment from my whole being, I entered into an encounter with the Lord that I saw with the eyes of my spirit man. First I saw my arms, as if opened up, almost the soul part of me, and I saw where the fragments of disappointment once were. The places were empty and many, though not huge.

I then saw two feather quills etching and filling each empty spot with a sort of liquid gold and gold leaf sort of material. I saw that two angels were working meticulously and thoroughly to fill these places with this deposit from the Lord as ordered by Him. Every broken place was mended with His gold and with His love and tenderness.

Suddenly as the vision ended, I felt led to rub each of my arms, one at a time, with my hands. As I did so, words from two parts of a Scripture flooded through my thoughts and I felt it was the Lord Himself speaking it:

“Set Me as a seal upon your HEART, as a seal upon your ARM… Many waters cannot quench this love, nor can the floods drown it.” (Song of Songs 8:6, just as I heard Him express it to me today.)

*HEART symbolizes our love for and devotion to the Lord; ARM symbolizes the works we do (out of love for Him) for His Kingdom.

The Lord showed me that if I set HIM as a seal over my heart and my arm, I will be protected from the disappointments that come in life and the emotions that they can bring. I will also move and do things out of His Spirit’s leading alone. And we know Proverbs 4:23, which reminds us to GUARD our hearts.

Later that evening the Lord also showed me that the gold that has been prophesied to cover my hands as I minister through worship, will come from within me and flow out of me. I suppose He is truly turning my mourning into dancing and my sadness into joy (Isaiah 61:3)! The below verse speaks to exactly how I had been feeling lately, and in this version especially. I pray this blesses you as well.

“Instead of your SHAME you will have a double portion,
And instead of HUMILIATION they will shout for joy over their portion.
Therefore they will possess a DOUBLE PORTION in their land,
Everlasting joy will be theirs.” (Isaiah 61:7 NASB)

God Believes in You

This post is apart of Sunday Setlists.

Some highlights from the message today:

  • Our God is a God of second chances! Just ask Jonah, and countless other Christians here today!
  • Hearing testimony through a song written and song by a woman visiting our church today who’s come out of addiction, and also a man who is a Katrina hurricane survivor.
  • God believes in us more than we believe in ourselves!
  • If you’re alive, it isn’t too late, no matter how far away from God you’ve gotten. He is a God of second chances!
  • God is in control of every single circumstance in our lives!

I think today God was doing some powerful things, though unseen to our eyes. God is working for sure.

Early service:

  • Lead Me to Calvary (Hussey/Kirkpatrick)
  • At the Cross (Hudson/Watts)
  • How Deep the Father’s Love for Us (Townend)
  • I’m Forever Grateful (Altrogge)
  • Choir: Calvary Is the Sea (Alexander/Clark/Wood, arranged by Sterling)
  • Ladies Ensemble: We Are the Body of Christ (Brown/Hampton)
  • Response: Cleanse Me (Orr/Maori melody arranged by Douglas)

Went speechless today especially after all of the songs reminding us of God’s love for us and Jesus’ sacrifice for us. Almost couldn’t pray prior to the offering time. Wow, God, I can’t believe You even care about me. I’m so not worth it–none of us are–but dang, You love us so!!

Contemporary service:

  • Mansion (Springer)
  • Freedom (Bushard)
  • Everybody Praise the Lord (Brewster)
  • Send the Fire (Booth)
  • Show Your Power (Prosch)
  • ‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus (Kirkpatrick/Stead)
  • What Only You Can Do (Edwards)

Newly Found in Christ

You can read a longer (yet less poetic!), more detailed version of my salvation testimony here.

A lot has changed over the last several months and it has stirred me to share, so here I am, beginning a blog. Looking back, I realize that this has been happening for a few years without my knowing exactly what it was–that is, Who it was!

Set free and made new

I’ve grown, learned, starting thinking about things differently, and been reborn. I’ve made discoveries about my life concerning myself and who I am. Some things weren’t actual “discoveries” in regard to this word’s meaning, but things religion and the world had caused me to believe about myself, people, morals, Heaven, etc. have been made right through Jesus Christ.

I know the truth and the truth has set me free. Jesus is Truth and He is the Way! God has finally been allowed to truly enter my life, and He has shown me who I truly am in Him.

Things I’ve learned

Never let the world make you into who you think you are. The world didn’t create you, God did! I often start to regret all the years I spent trying to figure out who I was–in music, in art, in what I do or don’t, in this world and its ways, but I remind myself that God was there even when I didn’t truly acknowledge His presence. He was always there, giving me the ability to know that when I finally found Him, I would discover that nothing else equals truth and love except Jesus and God’s Word.

My way of thinking is changing. It’s refreshing, it’s reassuring, it’s bringing more lasting peace, genuine friendship and real happiness into my life. I now know that only God can provide this; nothing of this world can. Even my values and goals have changed.

I have something to look forward to now and forever, no matter what happens in my life in the here and now. Most of all, I am saved! I now have a relationship with my awesome Creator, Father, Healer, Protector, Stronghold, my Everything, because Jesus Christ paid the price and made the way for me. He showed me the truth and I have received it and given my life to Him.

Growing in God

I’ve been growing in my relationship with God more and more as each day goes by! I used to think I was going to spend eternity in Heaven simply because I believed in God, but as I recently discovered, believing in God and having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ are not the same.

I did not know Jesus in a personal relationship or even live in a way that showed I loved Him. In fact, I didn’t love Him at all before because I didn’t know Him at all.

There is a huge difference between believing in Christ as the only way of salvation and surrendering your life to live for Him, versus just believing in God without relationship with Jesus.

Other things have been changing in my life too, but truly having Jesus in my life is why and how all of these things are changing more than anything else ever would or ever could. I’ve become a new person, my true self as God created me to be, through Him and my relationship with Him.

The last few months already I am happier, less stressed, less anxious, less afraid and less worried about how much money I make, where I live or what I can afford to buy. I don’t care what my status is in this world in relation to such things. I can live my life now with fewer outbursts of stress, anxiety, hurt and anger. I’m learning to change my thinking and my attitude toward life and other people in the most positive ways.

I’ve made mistakes, and I still make them. This is how it will always be as an imperfect human being, but I know even more now that it’s worth living a life closer to God (worth more than anything else!), living in a more Christ-like way and in service to Him & the people of this world, giving Him my all because of what He gave in sacrifice for my life. I’ll never be perfect or avoid making mistakes, but I surely want to try! I now have a True Inspiration to do so–Jesus Christ, even more now than ever.

I can’t get enough! Singing, playing, worshiping, praying, serving, reading His Word, thanking Him and feeling His presence. It’s all so amazing. I want to be glorifying Him, worshiping, serving and thanking Him every moment of my life. I’m glad to be truly living in the arms of God, and consciously so, each and every day of my life!

EDIT: By the way, I had my water baptism on Easter Sunday, April 8, 2007, and was baptized in the Holy Spirit on June 15, 2007. Thank You, Father, for this amazing journey You have me on!